7 months ago
27,971 notes
Reblog

+ LOL
+ pusheen

(606): A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week…

(Source: animation-magic)

if you’re gonna be a dickhead

I still can’t take you seriously if you’re on anon.

I mean I probably wouldn’t anyway, but being that you’re too much of a coward to message someone off-anon, why would anyone give a fuck what you say?

heysawbones:

A Proud Moment.I don’t have a degree in eating blocks of cream cheese, which sucks because I’m sure it would add a lot of value to my CV. (Instead, I have “lying, poorly”. Does that count?). I did eat a block of cream cheese once, though. I remember it fondly, because it was one of the proudest moments of my life. This probably says a lot about me, though god only knows what.I used to be part of a youth group, which is to say, yes, I was part of a church once. I was the “youth leader”, which is the church’s way of saying, “you are the only person in the youth group who doesn’t roll your eyes at us, when we talk to you.” What they did not know is that - aside from not actually being terribly religious - I had made the youth minister my sworn enemy.He was a weird guy. Very young; not too bright, frankly. Had a goatee, because the law requires all youth ministers to have goatees. It’s true. Look it up. He told us that Mormons owned Pepsi-Cola, and that The Gay Agenda created yaoi to recruit young men, the latter of which “fact” was really, really funny. A lot of the things he did were not so funny. Once, we went to a nursing home, where he decided to jump up and down in the elevator. He knew, of course, that I had an elevator phobia. I asked him to stop. He began sing-screaming, LONDON BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN as he jumped. A chaperone asked him to stop, couldn’t he see I was afraid? I backed into the corner and crouched there, clinging to the railing. That was the day he became more than just a moron. That was the day I decided I would make his youth-group life a hell.Most of the time, all I had to do was ask real questions about the Bible, and then ask him questions about his answers, and so on and so forth until he ran out of excuses, or said something deeply embarrassing. One day, he was trying to explain why it was still totally okay for parents to stone their kids to death for disobeying. He was flustered; inarticulate. I pulled a room-temperature block of Philadelphia cream cheese. He watched me unwrap it as he rambled on. I took a bite. I locked eyes. I did not look away. I ate in silence. There was confusion written all over his features. His sentences tumbled apart into further incoherence, and faded away. He was afraid. I cherish that moment. 
high resolution →

heysawbones:

A Proud Moment.


I don’t have a degree in eating blocks of cream cheese, which sucks because I’m sure it would add a lot of value to my CV. (Instead, I have “lying, poorly”. Does that count?). 


I did eat a block of cream cheese once, though. I remember it fondly, because it was one of the proudest moments of my life. This probably says a lot about me, though god only knows what.


I used to be part of a youth group, which is to say, yes, I was part of a church once. I was the “youth leader”, which is the church’s way of saying, “you are the only person in the youth group who doesn’t roll your eyes at us, when we talk to you.” What they did not know is that - aside from not actually being terribly religious - I had made the youth minister my sworn enemy.


He was a weird guy. Very young; not too bright, frankly. Had a goatee, because the law requires all youth ministers to have goatees. It’s true. Look it up. He told us that Mormons owned Pepsi-Cola, and that The Gay Agenda created yaoi to recruit young men, the latter of which “fact” was really, really funny. A lot of the things he did were not so funny. Once, we went to a nursing home, where he decided to jump up and down in the elevator. He knew, of course, that I had an elevator phobia. I asked him to stop. He began sing-screaming, LONDON BRIDGE IS FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN, FALLING DOWN as he jumped. A chaperone asked him to stop, couldn’t he see I was afraid? I backed into the corner and crouched there, clinging to the railing. That was the day he became more than just a moron. That was the day I decided I would make his youth-group life a hell.



Most of the time, all I had to do was ask real questions about the Bible, and then ask him questions about his answers, and so on and so forth until he ran out of excuses, or said something deeply embarrassing. One day, he was trying to explain why it was still totally okay for parents to stone their kids to death for disobeying. He was flustered; inarticulate. I pulled a room-temperature block of Philadelphia cream cheese. He watched me unwrap it as he rambled on. I took a bite. I locked eyes. I did not look away. I ate in silence. There was confusion written all over his features. His sentences tumbled apart into further incoherence, and faded away. He was afraid. 


I cherish that moment. 
naughtyornicechekov:

amandaonwriting:

Suggestions for changing paragraphs

Oh my FuckinDo you realize how annoying it is when you don’t switch paragraphs when a new character is speakingDo you realize how confusing it isI don’t care if they’re using one-word responses at each other, start a new damn paragraph. ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE CHARACTER.
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naughtyornicechekov:

amandaonwriting:

Suggestions for changing paragraphs

Oh my Fuckin
Do you realize how annoying it is when you don’t switch paragraphs when a new character is speaking
Do you realize how confusing it is
I don’t care if they’re using one-word responses at each other, start a new damn paragraph.
ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE CHARACTER.

askmovietrailervoice:
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askmovietrailervoice:

yakisobaru:

obsessionsaremylife:

avengersandcats:

its really hard to make  a lego’s death dramatic

Is he dying because he has been stabbed by a banana?

YES

I’m gonna die

Dear Tumblr

Lighten.
The.
Fuck.
Up.
Please.
Please.
Please.

OK SO IS THAT ALEXANDER SKARSGARD ON ZOOLANDER HEY HOW COME I JUST NOW NOTICED

I want to see more girl monsters. Girl giants, girl dragons, hulks & trolls. Scylla and hydra. Girl monsters who are huge and whole. Teeth and plush fur and long muscled tails. Heads enough to see you anywhere. Gleaming green or brown. But girl monsters are usually zombies or vampires. Pale and thin, bleeding or dead. Not Lady Lazarus, not a phoenix from the ash. I want to see how you get strong without being broken first. Get strong and stay strong. Get big and bigger.

Terror Incognita

#’getting strong without being broken first’ is like all i want from anything but especially girl monster stories  #stop making women small before you let them be big  #i am tired of revenge stories  #i am tired of all my heroines hurting

(via aimmyarrowshigh)

benchinko:

Anonymous asked you: Since you seem to be an avid user of Pokefusion, i would like to suggest the combination Slowpoke + Blastoise (Slowtoise). It’s quite humourous.


(rebloggable version uvu)

benchinko:

Anonymous asked you: Since you seem to be an avid user of Pokefusion, i would like to suggest the combination Slowpoke + Blastoise (Slowtoise). It’s quite humourous.

image

image

(rebloggable version uvu)

(Source: butternibblet)

high resolution →

camerupts:

image

there you go i think i summed up puella magica madoka magica up pretty well

(Source: spookyscarycamerupts)